My Futurography

Someone I know was actually required to do the following in a 500 word essay. Note that the word "futurogoraphy" is made up and not actually a synonym of the word autobiography at all. Mind you, I have no problem with making up words. If you do, though, (and this is a major rule in Sniglet Scrabble), the context has to coincide with your made-up word not be the antonym or completely out of context.

You may have written your autobiography, which

included how you would like your future story to be. We will call this

your futurography. The purpose of this therapy project is to write

your futurography in more detail.


OBJECTIVES

Making future plans.

Stating the kind of person you would like to be.

Thinking about what skills you will need in the future.

Write your futurography.

My Futurography (few-toro-graf-ee):

Hello, Wendy from the past. This is your autobiography from the future, your "futurography," if you will. I know how much you like milk so I've brought you a nice cold glass of of 6.75% milk from the future for you to enjoy while I tell you what you're all about...in the future. (I will just use "I" to refer to you since we are the same person but just in the future. That way we will avoid mixups. Sidebar: I love your vintage outfit!)

The good news is that the spoken word project has taken off! The Talkies and The Green Typewriters constantly perform together and last year (my time, which is like 6 years from now) I got married to Andrew Bird in a very small ceremony (I met him when I convinced Ryan to make him a door necklace to give to him, despite his widely known social anxiety-Andrew's, not Ryan's. We'll do Ryan's futurography later if he wants and talk about that.) Andrew came to a Talkies/Green Typewriters show and that's how everything happened. The rest is history. Or it is to me. For the past me it's futuristory? Anyhoo, so I'm very good at the guitar now and I also play the violin. It's coming along. I have an excellent teacher. It helps if you're sleeping with him! Sorry, you're the only one who hasn't heard that joke a million times.

Oh! I also finally finished my book. I'm working on sending out the manuscripts but I'm still a procrastinator. Plus, I just found this great burrito recipe everyone likes so we have burrito night every Wednesday. So, while that's going kind of slow, it's still going.

I finally have twenty-two pairs of prescription glasses and can match them with any outfit! Goal reached! I don't think I had a specific number in mind but I am happy with what I have.

For my birthday this year, Ryan and Anthony chipped in and bought me a Driver's Education class. At first, I was kind of pissed off because I still insist I'm not a horrible driver but I actually learned some things. For instance, there was an ice driving course involved. That was really helpful! Also I was allowed to drive my car around on the ice between cones and well, that's always awesome. At the end, they let me do a couple victory donuts on the ice.

How could I forget? I finally learned how to change a tire. Although, I tell you, these days it's a bit easier. I'll leave that one surprise for you. Enjoy your futurography! Oh, by the way. Don't eat the Jell-O at Dad's funeral just to be polite and really don't sign the guestbook. Bad decisions on both accounts.